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One Side: One Friend's Perspective

At times she films me while having a meal. It's jarring to spot myself on her Instagram – it feels like a sudden shock.

My best friend of 10 years, she, labels herself the “creativity monarch”. It’s fun for a bit, but it weighs on our relationship.

Being highly outgoing, she feels the need to record everything constantly. During meals out, she says, “The phone eats first,” and snaps pictures with the flash on, which makes me cringe. I don’t like it when other people see her performing for the camera – I experience vicarious awkwardness. It also frustrates me because meals lose their warmth.

She isn’t exactly an influencer yet, but she is aspiring to become one. She creates video blogs about living in our city, a day in her life, and her work as a stylist. The material is quality, I’ll give her that, but I don’t want to be dragged into it. Sometimes she films me while I’m eating, or simply tagging along. Later, I appear on her Instagram afterwards, and it pops up like a jumpscare: I’ll have no makeup on, making a strange expression or photographed while eating. It’s uncomfortable.

Marielle also anticipates that I will to record her at inconvenient times. Sometimes I’ll be talking to someone else, or we're simply spending time in the street. I feel like our bond has transformed into me serving as her free crew. She could easily hire someone if she wanted professional shots. When I brought up my discomfort about the situation, she brushed it off. She’s taken me to a couple of industry functions, which were appreciated, but that doesn’t make up for all the time and effort I invest helping her create material.

I’m grateful that Marielle has helped me with my career in design, but I don’t want our connection to become merely a tally of exchanges. I don't believe she’s fake or inauthentic, but sometimes I feel that if recording starts, we will start performing in a way that makes us look good for her channel.

Her directive is, “Alright, smile for the camera!” and record me laughing with someone. It’s so silly. I need her to understand that our 10-year friendship still has limits. I enjoy spending time with her, but I also desire to enjoy it without being recorded, edited, or posted for an audience. I’m not a prop for her Instagram.

The Defence: The Content Creator's View

I hope my friend to see that the content we make together can get us an opportunity.

I am passionate about shooting content. It’s not just a hobby; it's integral to who I am. Producing content and sharing my life online enables me to show my personality and engage with people in novel forms.

I don’t see myself as a full influencer yet, but it's savvy to make money from your interests. I look up to people on TikTok who pull off that aesthetic of informal, self-made film-making.

Content creation is my interpretation of living actively: noticing the details, sharing them with an viewership that appreciates the art behind it. It's never my aim to make Beth uneasy. Bringing her to industry events was my method of offering access, providing her a opportunity to experience behind-the-scenes moments that could benefit her professional path too. That’s not blackmail, it’s just being realistic.

I would take her to these events even if she didn’t help me, but I desire her to see what the work we create together can get us: a foot in the door. I understand not all people enjoys being filmed, but sometimes unplanned moments is what makes content authentic. Appearing on video from time to time is part and parcel of being my friend. I would delete anything she asked, but she has never asked yet.

I don't demand anybody to be my private filmmaker, but companions support one another in small ways. My assumption was filming a short video here or there would be fun for her. Creativity flourishes in collaboration, and having Beth around makes endeavors lively and enjoyable. I don't compel her to take part in anything, and I would never deliberately humiliate her. But filming together sometimes is part of how I record our time together.

I value Beth’s friendship deeply and don’t want content creation to come between us. I’m willing to compromise: like requesting permission before filming, and avoiding shots that might make her uncomfortable.

This is not about control, it’s about sharing my world while still considering hers. Clearly content creation is not a substitute for real connection: it's merely part of how I live my life and I want her to be included in a way that’s agreeable for both of us.

Outside Perspectives: Public Sentiment

Should Marielle stop recording herself and her friend when they are out together?

There’s nothing more uncomfortable than having a friend point a camera at you. I understand that it’s Marielle’s job, but I don’t make friends come to my workplace. Maybe she can find like-minded creators to create content with. With the uncertain future of AI, personal relationships are the only thing we have – cherish them!
A respondent, 25

When pursuing something as a career, you can’t ask your friends for assistance repeatedly, even if they have done it before. If Marielle loves creating, that doesn't imply everyone around her is content. She must to honor her friend's personal space.
Ankit, 26

Marielle might love producing videos and showing off her life online, but it isn't for everybody. It was kind she has assisted her friend professionally, but she needs to listen to what her friend desires.
A commenter, 27

It seems like you value each other, so hold on to that and ensure it’s the priority in your friendship. Foster some real experiences, where true emotions are stored, not digital scrapbooks. In fact, celebrities who seem to reveal their worlds actually have more secrecy than it seems.
One opinion, 53

She seems to be not fully engaged nor genuine when they're together – she's on the job. Each appears unsure as to where the line is. The solution is not found in trying to alter one another, but in each setting defined limits around what is comfortable to them and seeing if there is an acceptable middle ground.
Barbara, 71

Your Turn to Be the Judge

Consider this question: is Marielle over-exposing their bond?